Collaborative Divorce is an effective and innovative approach to handling divorces. Whether your situation is relatively straightforward, or more complex this process is designed to provide you and your spouse the safety, structure and discretion you need to have difficult conversations which are essential to a healthy divorce and a happy post-separation life.
Collaborative Divorce empowers you to find your voice and “say what you mean, mean what you say, just don’t say it mean!” As part of an interdisciplinary team, we work together (i.e. collaborate) to find solutions that meet the basic and higher needs of your family. You gain the benefit of your own lawyer so you know you will be protected. We also include a mental health coach and a neutral financial professional as part of the team. In this way, you have access to the professional you need given the task at hand. This is not a lawyer dominated process. When you work with the appropriate professional at the appropriate time, you save money in lawyer’s fees over the course of the divorce.
We move forward when you ready. You work with the professional most suited to the issue presented: emotional, financial or legal. We engage in voluntary disclosures and we don’t play games or tricks. We move forward with integrity and mutual respect for each other and the process. We don’t go to court and we don’t threaten to go to court. Should you or your spouse choose to leave the Collaborative Divorce process then you will go to court with a new litigation attorney, not your Collaborative attorney. This disqualification clause is the foundation of our work together and provides the incentives for all of us to take care of business and settle your case. No court.
We are not here to shame and blame. We are here to support you, to make your future better and to put your children first. No one wants a divorce to become a risk factor for your kids’ psychological growth and development. Your positive behavior teaches them how to handle adversity with grace and dignity. We advocate for your needs in a safe and structured process. Choosing a Collaborative Divorce demonstrates for your children, family and friends what resilience looks like.
This is a voluntary, private and discreet process. It is not a public spectacle. The only time we mention court is when we are ready to file the necessary paperwork and final settlement documents for an uncontested divorce. You never step foot in a courtroom, and neither do we. The final divorce order comes in the mail.
We create an emotionally safe place to talk about the most important things in your life at a time when you may be feeling the most vulnerable. This is essential to building trust and accountability. We need trust and accountability to make a sustainable and equitable agreement so that you can both be free to live your own lives. When you are both feeling emotionally secure, you can stay friendly and supportive of each other, for the benefit of your children, extended family and community.
This is a process with well-developed protocols. We all have a role. No one dominates the process. We follow a roadmap, we do our homework, we set agendas, we stay in touch, and we intervene if there is a set-back (and there will be, there usually are a few). We help you get the work done so that you are not stuck feeling bitter and resentful for the rest of your adult life.
We think divorce is about finding your voice and your authentic self. We get it. And we know there are better ways to divorce that do not leave a legacy of bitterness and resentment, broken hearts, broken children and financial ruin.